NO CLASS

I stared into my eyes
Today,
I thought
No way!
Hey
Are you still here?
The mirror stared
Back at me,
I could see
The glee
Eyes blurred
Too much beer.
Hair such a mess,
I prayed
God bless
For the way I dress,
Scruffily casual
Hear hear.
I opened the door
Took my place
Amongst the poor,
Working class
Kiss my ass
I know the sneer.
I see me
Plain as can be,
Scum or fly
We all bleed and die
Piss in a lavatory
Is that clear?
You ain't any better
Doctor or lawyer
Still a bed wetter,
Don't shit your pants
We're all just worker ants
What? Is that fear.
Look into my eyes
See the future?
There are brighter skies
Take your head out your arse
No such thing as class,
Equality is the land to steer.

Phil Hall  October 2014

NORRIS Mc SQUIRTER

Although not in pain
One slight strain
Can cause a stain,
So
What you must do
Is stay close to the loo
And avoid the bubble poo,
The dreaded
Norris Mc Squirter.
The guts may not hurt
Each fart may cause a spurt
A terrible liquid squirt,
Though
Quick off the blocks
Pebble dashed jocks
Its trickled to your socks
Oh dear
You've Norris Mc Squirtered.
Was it the odd food snaffled?
That caused a bubbling babble
So the bog you pap baffled,
To
Muffle the echoing blast
Of a mudslide racing fast
The result of recent repast,
A belch
From Norris Mc Squirter.
Oh how the bowels sing
And the terrible ring sting
On the throne of an agonized king,
It
May not last long
The wrenching of guts so strong
And the gaseous cloudy pong
You've just met
Norris Mc Squirter.

Phil Hall  October 2014

ALIEN ASPARAGUS

I've just eaten
Alien asparagus,
Tasting slightly salty
Sweet and lingering
On the tongue
And
Cooking it
Was not a fuss.
Small in size
Far from being a minus,
Full and juicy
Firm and fresh
Would you like
To try a piece
Of alien asparagus?
Too bad
It's not for sale.

Phil Hall  October 2014