COLD BUFFETS

             COLD BUFFETS

God, I hate cold buffet food,

But, you must take a plate so not to be rude.

I might try some cheese, or a slice of ham,

But, what’s that in breadcrumbs, I’m sure it’s Spam!!

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I’m convinced that’s the reason I feel so glum,

Why do they cover prawns and egg in cold crumb?

Rubber chicken drumsticks all purulent and pale,

Egg mayonnaise sandwiches curled up and stale.

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Black pudding, not so much black and full of fat,

A quiche with broccoli, that looks like a splat.

It’s just an awful interlude during a dismal night,

Listening to tunes by a DJ who’s shite.

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Watching the drunkards staggering while trying to dance,

Then trying to ignore an ugly woman’s glance.

Please serve me hot food, and then all would be fine,

So at least I’ll stop at the party until at least half nine.

Phil Hall  Mar 2012