ONLY HALLS AND WALSHS

This is a tale
Of fishermen three,
A bigger bunch of idiots
You'll never likely see.
The Halls specialise
In breaking fishing chairs,
Whilst Walsh keeps catching
His tackle in a tree.
There are two
Who cause most mayhem,
The other one
(That's me)
Who always catches
The first fish,
But then needs the lavatory.

We seem to do ok
But, we haven't got a clue
We get in so many tangles
And turn the air quite blue.
Big Mike's known as 'Foggy'
He's the sensible one,
All his fish make quick bites
When he strikes
They're gone!!
He takes so long to set up
The days nearly over
Before he can begin,
He sometimes does
Something really daft
By going and falling in.

Big Dick loves his gadgets
To try and catch his fish,
He uses NASA type technology
Like using a satellite dish.
It doesn't improve his catching
In fact it blackens his joyous mood,
But, he always wins the plaudits
With his selection of gourmet food.
Foggy and me sit drooling
At Dicks consumable collection,
Moules mouliniere and cracked crab
Foie gras and venison on his grocery tab
All washed down with Bollinger
Delivered to him direct from Fortnum and Mason.

Now I try to concentrate on fishing
With this madness all around,
Like Big Dick breaking another seat
And casting out lying on the ground.
Foggy catching yet another tree
And losing his favourite float,
Or hooking a mans trousers
Whilst sailing past in his little boat.
It's impossible to remain focused
With these madman sat with me,
So I give up trying to catch fish
And settle down with a cup of tea.
Big Dick bores easily and he likes to play up,
So he fires a catapult full of maggots
That all land in my cup.
+++++++++++++
We're all known to catch fish though
Some being of specimen weight,
And it's always great fun with my brother
And big Irish Foggy, our best mate.
We've had so many great adventures
Far too numerous to mention here,
But, the only constant thing on any fishing trip is
We always end up having a beer.

Cast
Mike Walsh as Foggy or Big Mike
Richard Hall as Big Dick
Phil Hall as Me.

Phil Hall  November 2013.