Jack Spratt
Was so fat
And his wife
Was so obscene,
They both needed emergency ops
Thank god for the bariatric team.
Wee Eddie Miliband
Canvassing the town,
Trying to clear up the mess
Made by Gordon Brown.
Promises and pledges
In a speech full of fight,
But he'll never beat the Tories
Because his policies are shite.
Three pubic lice
Three pubic lice
See how they itch,
When you caught them
You did scream
You were put on a course
Of a genital cream,
It looked like your nuts
Were turning green
Just to get rid of
Three pubic lice.
Scary Mary
Away with the fairy
How does your cannabis grow?
With water
And at night
Artificial light
And marijuana plants
All in a row.
Phil Hall October 2013
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